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Saturday, November 11, 2017
@ 12:38 AM
hello.
its been a long while again and here i am back again contemplating about life. well... things had not been going smooth as what i had predicted and yea honestly i would say i am in a life crisis? ha..
i realised im really into going the way of journalism but uh.. i havent got the chance to do so? so far i have been doing online marketing for the past two interns but it was for maybe a month? the reality had pushed me so much that recruiters told me that those are just part time and not real jobs. i know i shouldnt be so affected by what they said but it just somehow did.
i was telling dixxon abt what happened to do and he told me about how we kinda had been living in our own 'circle' even though we have been living in korea for 5 years. wow. like it just hit me and slapped me right in the face.
the 'we' which i wrote here refers to storytellers. i mean we have been 'protecting' ourselves and each other for the past 4 years. whenever sth happened to us, we honestly depend on each other because who else would understand us better than us?? so yea. i guess we were kinda strong in terms of protection that we didnt actually step out of our comfort zone and break into the korean society which we have been living in. i know this sounds kind of abstract but i feel that its rather true.
so right now. like now. im kinda lost i would say. i feel like i wont be able to work in a super koreanised company and i cant do marketing. lol. idk. its just hard to explain sometimes what koreans really want.
interesting really. i thought i have been living in korea for at least the past 4 years because i had much more interactions with koreans since i joined dt. but then again after this 4 years, im on my way to step into the new world. the real korean world perhaps?
it hits you hard and right smack in the face. oh lord. i just hope i would be able to handle that fall.
Labels: friends, job, korea, kudt, life, seeking, storytellers
Wednesday, October 04, 2017
@ 10:10 PM
셀레는 만큼 많이 두려워
hello
so it has been ages~ since i last updated this blog. haha. im not sure who still reads it but yea im back for an update.
a lot of things had happened since i last blogged. i'm currently at my last semester of university and can you believe thats already happening? lol. i cant believe its been more than 5 years since i came to korea and the next thing i knew, im already finishing my last sem, submitting resumes to companies, looking for a job etc. wow. time sure flies when you arent aware of it.
honestly 2017 has been going through like a buzz. i already kinda knew this may or may not be my last year here in korea, im hoping not because i want to stay and find a job here before going back to sg. so yea in any case, i have been kind of treasuring the moments which i have in korea right now. a lot of things had happened which made me feel that way and i think it took me some time to realise that. and i think once u start treasuring those stuff, life seems to get better. haha. well, thats at least what i think.
recently the thing which has been on my mind is dance. haha. surprisingly because i bet those who still follow me on insta know that im crazy over bts these days. i still am, its just i suddenly have a lot of thoughts of fangirling vs reality. so the thing is i recently finished my performance for ku vs yonsei games and ive been thinking its most probably gonna be my last performance this year? maybe. but idk. i feel like because of job applications and everything i have this internal conflict abt me dancing and me facing the reality. i realised that i dont think i can put a restriction on myself dancing because theres just this part of me which still want to dance badly. i mean i can pause for awhile but i dont think i can say it will be the last time for me. and so ever though i wrote those kind of post on fb and insta i feel like i will still perform at kudt annual concert most probably at the year end. LOL. i was looking at other seniors and they already graduated yes. but they still take the time and effort to come out to practice and i thought abt it and im like why cant i do that too. sure they are koreans and they already have a house to stay and most probably would not have as much issues as i have but its because of the passion they have thats why they are still coming back to kudt even though they have already graduated etc. so i guess theres no way to stop someone from doing sth which they really like.
im not sure if u guys know this program called 'idol school' but its apparently mnet's newest form of selecting girls to debut as idol. its kinda similar to produce 101 but like a school girl concept. so anyway, this girl who was from produce 101 went to idol sch again but got eliminated again so she didnt get to debut in the end. i didnt watch the show till the end but i just follow the news. shes a year younger than me and the other time i casually commented to my frens that maybe she should just resort to fate and take it that shes not meant to debut. but after that i felt bad for saying that because i just kinda of sabotage myself too. so yes, i sincerely apologise for that comment. because i dont think its possible to stop someone from achieving what they want until they really get it. its sad to see how many times she had tried to reach out for her dream but fate is not in her way. her courage to keep going really amazes me and i really feel bad for saying sth like that.
i guess it really depends on how much you want to achieve something. if it kept pulling u back and discourage u from doing sth its ok to stop and rest for awhile. perhaps reset yr goals and think abt future strategies on how to deal with it. well, thats what i have been doing. and i think its getting better. or at least i hope. XD i mean ive been getting rejected from companies for a job and i think its ok for that to happen. ive seen many frens who submitted almost 100 applications and they only get call back from a few companies who seemed to be interested. i guess eveyrthing just goes back to failing and getting back up. its up to how much u want to commit and far u are willing to go. i think these days im pretty positive, its just i freak out easily from time to time XD its ok. i will get better and deal with all these stuff i hope ^^
and i think i kinda figure out why i enjoy blogging for the past 10 years. it kinda gets me to sort out my thoughts much more easier because i put them down into words. i get to picture it much more easier which i guess its a good way for me to think abt stuff. haha. yup.
i think i will most probably try and revive this blog asap when i get the time XD but anw, those who still read. thank you. XD
cheers haha.
Labels: bts, dance, friends, job, korea, ku, life
Monday, May 01, 2017
@ 9:58 PM
꽃처럼 아름답게
hello
its been a long while once again. so ive been pretty alright~ just studying and doing stuff which i have never done before and doing stuff which i have never thought i would be doing again.
so i shall begin with the most recent event which was going to a club. lol. ive been to a club back in sg when i turned 18 but that was like almost 6 years ago?? and i was really young and i didnt know what and how to enjoy clubbing. but now im feeling it. XD haha. no its more like i know how to play and at the same time watch out for yourself and your friends.
so jan, ara and mirah we all met up at anam and then we went to hangang at first because there was a free event by kuba and then we could just get in for free. it was actually held on a cruise boat and i swear i have never been to that part of the han river before. i would say its pretty cool but idk why i feel weird seeing people who were in the same class as u there and u just awkwardly have eye contact with them but u dont really know if u should say hi or not.. so im like.. hmmm. XD and because it was on a cruise?? so there was not much of the dance floor like a real club. so we actually just went there to take pics and then we left. we headed down to the food court area below and we ate thai food. it was claimed by jan to be legit. and i do agree because its one of the best pad thai which i had ever tried in korea. i need to head over bangkok one day. i swear why did i not go to thailand when i was still in sg last time? XD
lovely s.e.a. team
and then we head to itaewon. and since ara is working in 'made' she managed to get us free entry and that was when it began. hahahaha. i would say i was surprised by the club culture in itaewon. oh yea before that. i have to say the clubbing areas are usually, hongdae, gangnam, kondae as well as itaewon in seoul. but if i were to stereotype the clubs, hongdae usually is more for younger ppl and its more... touchy? i heard. and as for gangnam, its where the richer people and celebrities hang out. kondae is more of university ppl i guess.. kinda similar to hongdae. and for itaewon, they have more lgbt clubs and clubs targeted for foreigners.
so the interesting and unique thing about 'made' is that the club is separated into 2 different sections. one side plays hiphop music and the other side plays edm. i thought i would have enjoyed the hiphop side more but when i headed over to the edm side everything seemed to be much more fun. hahaha. i think because the beats were really sick and u know when u are a street dancer u would want to match the beats XD
however that is not the main point of my post today. i feel like i had observed something abt girls who club in korea. maybe im generalising but this is what i felt after going clubbing. i guess its naturally for girls to dress up nicely in short and tight dresses which accentuate their figures but i feel like because of the restriction of the dress, you cant really have fun. well for me, i wore black skinnys with a black loose blouse with black walkers. but i could really dance and have fun with my frens because i werent worried abt exposing parts of my body which i was uncomfortable with. but when i turned around and see the girls around me, they were just like bouncing and waiting for guys to approach them. well, i guess everyone has different motivations when they head to clubs. mine was just to have fun with my frens and check out the korean clubbing culture. but i guess for others it might be hooking up and having a fling. well, i dont support it but i also believe at the same time its totally up to the person to judge as long as u feel alright with doing such actions.
but one thing which i wasnt quite happy was when some guys try to 'take' my frens away in a rude manner. i would think its basic manners to approach guys in a less scary manner instead of just tugging my fren's arms and expecting girls to follow u. like seriously??? so we ended up having to prey my fren's arms away from his hands. wtf. haha. but besides that it was fun. there were also many funny episodes but i guess i should just keep them to myself haha.
well i go back again? yes. but maybe not so often. lol. im getting old and i think i need more than a day to recover from so much dancing. hahahahahaha. and my ears. XD and the smoke. oh yea the smoke. gosh.... i didnt know u can smoke inside clubs in korea. or is it just me?? does sg clubs allow that? i had no idea. and i thought i was gonna die inside. lol.
but the shit and the thing which really made me feel sick was when we were taking a cab back home together. with me jan and ara. mirah went back home first cos we kind of lost her in the club. lol. we tried to find her but couldnt. and guys. pls try not to go alone in a cab after clubbing or late at night cos it might be really dangerous. esp for girls.
i feel like the taxi ahjussi was like seeing us just finished clubbing and i swore his attitude sucks from the beginning. and he tried to put on the seat belt for ara and he touched jan's leg. i think its kinda long to explain what happened and how it happened but it did. so i was really shocked and at the point of time i really felt like shouting at him but at the same time i thought abt the possibilities of what could have happened if i did. because ara was sitting infront and jan and i were at the back seats. would i cause him to become agitated and would that result in a car accident and cause even more harm to us. or does he have like a small knife or weapon holding in his possession? u never know. so i really tried to stay calm and i swear every time i feel nervous i can tell like my stomach gets really scrunched up. bad sign. and so i told alex to call me because for some reason i cannot press call on my phone and this showed how panicky i was XD sigh. but he did call me and i explained the current situation in chinese cos u never know if he knows english. so yea. we took a photo of the license plate after that. it was the worst taxi ride i ever had in korea out of my almost 5 years here.
the thing was i felt really helpless. i couldnt do anything and i think its really mean for ppl to take advantage of such situations. really? thinking that because we are female foreigners we dont know what is sexual harrassment and where we can complain? and furthermore this semester im taking human rights class. talking abt this right now again makes me mad. really. sometimes i just feel like this world... brings disappointment to u but at the same time it really just shows u how some people are really like. the sick thing of what the taxi ahjussi said was 'its nice to be young' wow. wowwwwww. and yes hes old. thats why it made me feel even more disgusted. urghhhh
so in conclusion. becareful everywhere u go. like u might think its safe but its not. and dont drink drinks from guys who u have never seen before and dont take it! and be aware of yr drink. dont leave it on an empty table and go back to it after awhile. i mean i might be over suspicious and stuff but i believe its really better to be sure than sorry. u know.
i think ive spent more than an hour writing this blog here and there haha. yes.
work hard live hard!
Labels: club, friends, itaewon, korea, ku, life, night life, school, university
Sunday, April 02, 2017
@ 11:43 AM
헤헿~
hello.
its april already can u believe it?? and i got the feeling that im actually falling sick because of the season change and it kinda sucks. lol. its like these days im so busy with work and i feel like im not studying as much as im supposed to be and im getting worried cos its less than 3 weeks to mid terms. gg.
things aside, i went to a korean wedding yesterday and like what i have already said on my fb post, it was a military wedding. meaning the groom is a commander in the military school and the venue was held in the military base academy. i would say its a very very eye opening experience and im glad that i got invited to the wedding.
my point was about getting married. my sister already got married last year summer and this time with me attending another wedding made me feel like its interesting how and why people get married. this sem im taking a class called 'human communication' and so far i'd learnt why people stay in some relationships and why ppl decide to leave and remain single etc. it made me think a lot about my relationships with other people and why i continue to do so.
getting married its not a simple and easy thing and i feel that u have to have that basic amount of commitment and trust for your partner. plus, economic status and the relationship with yr in laws family. its weird how im thinking of this but i feel like this is what u have to consider when u decide if u really want to spend the rest of yr life with a specific someone. but then again some may argue (this is not an essay lol) that this is why people get married. because theres risk in it and its life. u cant be sure of whats gonna happen in life and thats what made life interesting and special. u live because of ur life. if ure gonna be so sure of whats gonna happen in the future then whats the point? u just plan according to what u want and meh. no fun.
costs and gains i must say. but watching miryeong unnie getting married yesterday just made me feel like she had taken such a big step in her life. really hope for the best for her marriage~ ^^
another reason why i have decided to blog today is because of what i feel abt relationships these days. lol. maybe im lonely. yes i think thats the reason why. but anw as u can tell from my few previous posts, its like bts bts bts. lol. and i have been thinking why are some ppl obsess with ppl whom they have hardly ever met in real life. like what is the cause and reason for them to become so into them. u get what i mean?
yea so because of that i have been questioning myself. and i believe its because of recent events, stress and kpop idols are like a channel for ppl to relieve their stress? its like looking at sth so perfect. them having to train for years before being able to debut and stuff and when they do, they are finally able to experience the fame and sweetness of success. its like a reflection of reality (but not entirely). you will succeed if u work hard and believe in yourself. so i guess thats why idols act as a source of hope for some people. i did for me. and i have also read accounts where an elf almost committed suicide but it was suju for brought her back to life or sth like that. it does sound over dramatic but i believe its real. there must be something which the elf had seen in suju.
interesting. very interesting. this kpop idol relationship. haha. idk what im doing again. im supposed to get lunch and study and yea.
happy aprils to all those out there and stay healthy~! ^^
Labels: bts, friends, idols, korea, kpop, life, marriage, school, study, suju, wedding
Sunday, February 26, 2017
@ 9:30 PM
누나의 마음을 이렇게 훔쳐가면 어떻게.. 태형아
hello.
so as u can tell from my picture of the day. lol. yes. i have totally become an army and falling for bts faster than i ever imagined. i dont know why but i think it was because of the mnet broadcast which i went on thursday.
i knew that bts were coming back with spring day and not today but i didnt expect them to be that charismatic. XD lol. ok idk what i am saying anymore because in just a matter of 3 days time i have totally gone head over heels for taehyung. i think the drama hwarang also played a huge role in this kpop fangirling thing again but i think it was the live show that caused me to behave like this. hahahahaha. anw thats for that now.
good news to announce to who ever might be reading this. lol. i know this blog is old and its just for my personal collection and memory sake but yea. whoever is out there.
i am officially an INTERN! YESSSSSS!
and im starting work tmr. kinda excited and nervous at the same time. im not sure what to expect but i think i shouldnt let my guard down. oh before i talked more about the intern and what nots. i would like to give a special mention to my yuna unnie whos currently back in japan. she and i have known each other for almost 4 years and i was talking to her through kakao call on fri.
so yes, ever since she had gotten her master degrees in korean lang teaching degree in ku, she had went back to japan to find a job. it wasnt a smooth process and she went through a lot of trouble in finding the right job because first she wanted to keep it related to her degree and at the same time something that is enjoyable as a job. she has also been teaching korean to jap students as a private tutor and apparently some companies in japan, im not sure if it applies to all? but u cant have double job or sth. so the companies she had applied to all kind of rejected because she said she's teaching korean on sat. most of them tend to want their employees to be available on the weekend i guess. so because of that she was unable to find a proper job until recently. and im really happy for her and im glad that things managed to work out for her.
so i guess my point of mentioning about yuna is the fact that how hard work will always pay off and patience is always a virtue. i guess btw dec last year and this year i have changed a lot and learnt quite a lot from many people around me. my family, close friends in singapore and the people i have met in korea.
when i told her that i passed my interview for my intern as well, she was so happy for me too. its so strange sometimes i feel and kinda funny too. that i clique well with people older with me sometimes. i dont mean like in a bad way but i feel like sometimes am i maturing faster than before or was it because i worry more things than other people. idk. but it feels good to hear that people are sincerely happy for u even though its not happening for them. theres just this pride in your heart.
which brings me to my next point. i attended jam's graduation ceremony yesterday. it was kinda 정신없어 but i thought it should have been much more organised. haha. idk. u know how in singapore, when u graduate, u get to go up to stage and receive yr cert? my dept doesnt have that and u just sit, listen to prof give speeches and clap hand for the graduate school people. and then u get to take photo and leave the theatre. i mean. its a good and bad thing i guess. haha. idk. so u just collect yr cert outside the theatre. but anw~ when i saw his family gathering around him and its like just so heartwarming. its like u finally got yr degree and its the time to pay back in tribute to yr family by finding a job and supporting them. haha idk. such an asian culture but i guess its just deep inside me as well. XD anw, congratulations once again to jam! so proud of him~ ^^
with the graduation ceremony being held yesterday, it just gave me the chills that the winter break is almost over and this coming thursday will be my last spring semester. lol. i have 1 more year to go but its my last spring sem in ku so yea. time really flies huh..
going back to my intern. lol. sorry i kept going here and there. but anw i was actually supposed to receive the results on fri. the ceo told me that latest will be out on fri so for the entire week i was just waiting anxiously for the result. but it didnt not come on fri. so i was feeling really dejected and stuff because i mean, if an employer were to pick u and thought u had potential, they would have made a decision right away right? haha. that was what i thought. anw, so around 2am, i received a text and the ceo told me to reply tmr morning since it was late night. at that moment i was like... what is this. a 2am text with supreme cliffhanger. lol. i swore i couldnt sleep properly last night because of cockroach sound and i kept thinking what could the text mean. lol. this is why its true that girls overthink a lot and freak out during a relationship. but anw back to my point, yea.
i actually only receive the confirmation yesterday night when i received a call from the ceo. at first i couldnt hear properly what he was saying mainly because i think he was outside and there was like cars passing by. so i think when he first announced that i got the intern, i was just like 'neh' cos i couldnt hear properly and i was just going along because it was kind rude/strange to ask can u repeat that? LOL. idk. anw so i was just like in my mind did he say yes or no. XD haha. and i think perhaps because due to my lack of response he kind of repeated it in another way and asked me when i could begin working. that was when i finally realised i got the intern. and he told me he actually thought about whether i was suitable for the job because its still a small company and all but the decision factor was the morality question. he asked me if i would choose to sacrifice the company's profit or the employee's right? its hard because in a company ure supposed to make profits and grow but at the same time, what if u had to neglect some rights for yr employees at the same time. which will u choose? i went with protecting the rights and i guess that was why he chose me.
so, always stick with yr morals and values ^^ haha.
hopefully tmr will turn out fine and this upcoming semester will be a rather busy but fruitful one! ^^
Labels: bts, friends, graduation, intern, internship, kim taehyung, korea, life, university, v
Thursday, February 02, 2017
@ 2:51 PM
늘 계획 대로 안 이루어진 것 같다
hello.
next week i will be heading back to korea and this 1 mth trip back home felt so satisfying than before. i know i havent leave yet but i will just feel like i doubt i will have time to write how i feel during the weekends or when i head back to korea.
well, firstly i think its because i have been doing a lot of 'me' time. healing from the break up and finding out more about myself, what kind of person am i, what do i really want to achieve in life, what do i see in a guy and expect of, what i plan to do in this year.
sometimes i still look back almost 5 years ago and wonder if i really regret my decision in leaving singapore and heading to korea to pursue my own dreams. i was only 18 back then and i guess it was youth and curiosity which pushed me out to find out how the world was like. the phrase 'the grass is always greener on the other side', it seemed really green back then. i dont find it as green as before. oh how contradictory it is to say. XD haha. even i find it funny. theres always two side to each things. you will just want to see the pretty side and as time goes by u cant help but see the real ugly side. some part of me regrets the way i handled the situation back then but i dont really my decision. if i had not studied abroad i would never know the ugly side of korea and the pretty side of singapore.
next, i feel like i got to spend more time with my family. i feel like i have matured over the past relationship and it really did open up my eyes about family and marriage. family comes first no matter what and you just got to be grateful and cherish them. i love my dad, my mum and my sis. its interesting how u only appreciate what u have when you get older. will i ever get married at this rate? haha. i dont know. am i able to commit into a relationship again? good question to consider. then again, do i want to get married?
i also get to meet my close friends. those ive met since pri sch and sec sch and everyone is pursuing and trying to find their own path. im glad i have those friends, those who u get to go through thick and thin and share the joy and happiness with each other. those who may be miles apart and living in a different time zone, you just get together and rattle on forever like old times. ^^
so, i have been trying to prepare myself to return back to korea. meaning the cold. lol. the bills which i have not paid while i am here. plus, i will have to re-contract my room with my landlord. which kinda sucks because 1 more year in that place. sigh... its cheap but the facilities and no soundproof wall. TT and i have to go to the telecomm shop to ask them to make a new nano sim card for me so i can finally use my iphone. lol. and possibly go to emart and stock up on some food so i wont have to go out. and i want to clean my room again. throw out some useless stuff and recycle some clothes. ive also been thinking what to do with my costumes from my past performances... wear them during halloween? LOL. but by then it will be super cold. anw, i will think about it when im back there.
for now, i shall just enjoy singapore air and my bed. haha.
Labels: family, friends, korea, life, plans, singapore, thoughts
Friday, October 02, 2015
@ 5:17 PM
hello.
im back from the busy life im having right now. goyeonjeon and hanging with friends during chuseok. i was supposed to update my post like almost a week ago but i was just feeling kind of tired and lazy and not really in the mood to use my fingers. lol. so yea.
goyeonjeon was awesome and it was kinda unexpected that our item got so much popularity and managed to receive so much support and cheers. haha XD and for the 2nd time of my life i finally dance in heels again. the first was 'mercy' back in ac. and yea. dated donggyu for 100 days and we went to celebrate during the chuseok long weekend and then the next day went to han river to celebrate mid-autumn festival with the storytellers. haha. and pretty much and good rest for me during the 5 days break.
actually im watching sex in the city season 4. i just ended season 3. but i didnt watch 1 and 2. because this sem im having this class called film criticism and we watched the first episode of season 3. and then ever since then it kinda caught my attention and i just started watching it. idk why but as i watched through the episodes i kinda of felt and learnt quite a lot from this drama. mainly its because im dating someone now and most of the important characters carrie, miranda, charlotte and samantha.
one of the more impt episode which i remember was that carrie cheated on her current bf and slept with her ex bf. and in the end they broke up and stuff like that. obviously i have been worrying about my own relationship. as of now things seem kinda stable btw me and my bf. but i have always thought about the problem when donggyu leaves for army next year in feb. well, nth is confirm yet but most probably if everything goes accordingly to his plan he wants to enter the army in feb. and so yea. wow. am i going to wait? am i able to wait? should i wait?
2 years is not a short time and no one knows what is going to happen during that 24 months. i was talking with him over fruit beer last night. lol. yes fruit beer tastes so much better than normal beer. but anw we were talking about this issue. i think if the woman is able to wait and continue to stay loyal then i must say why not? but in the middle some other guy appears, u nv know what is going to happen. he also told me that he would love for me to wait but he wouldnt force me to wait because 2 years is going to be a long time. oh god. i can feel myself kind of tearing up as i type this. haha. but anw idk. as of now im gonna wait but i cant gurantee myself if i can wait for 2 years.
will i still be in korea after 2 years? i do hope i will be. perhaps by that time i will be more clear of what i want to pursue in the future. and i do hope that it will be in the area of dance and writing. haha. life is tough. never easy. but doesnt mean ppl should give up on it.
Labels: dance, friends, kudt, life, love
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
@ 12:13 AM
Ri-Hey Performance Skool
2015.05.17
hello.
almost 2 mths ago i was freaking out about the audition to get into the union performance skool and now im just sad that everything kinda ended yesterday.
through the past 2 mths i have been busy mostly for practices and sometimes school work. lol. yes 80% dancing and 20% school work. i have also been thinking quite a lot about my future. and the day before union on sat i forgot who i was talking to about but i said sth like im not going to do union performance skool again next sem but im like shit no way man. im taking those words back because i hella enjoyed it.
throughout the past 2 mths we went through about 8 or more practices including two times midnight practices which was like shit yo. lol. never in my life have i gone through midnight prac so tiring. haha. but then again it all ended up well so i dont really mind. i think its the thing u feel after the performance. that achievement and sense of accomplishment. and i really felt that im so lucky to be able to perform with rihey ssaem. TT cant wait for the video to be up soon. hehe~ ^^
and another thing i realised what i liked about dancing was about how u can be a totally different person on stage. online and offline. kinda. haha. i was told by the dt kids that i look different when i get serious in dancing. and yes i agree. and i think its kinda like a role play thing? XD yesterday's concept was like a bitchy sexy concept and with my newly dyed red hair i think i kinda fit in pretty well. haahahahaha. and really, next time when i get older i doubt i will ever have the chance to wear sth like yesterday ^^
yup. im still busy these days mainly focusing more on school work now and team projects. and today is the start of the school festival~! cant wait for ipselenti! ^^
잘하고 싶다.
Labels: dance, friends, korea, kudt, life, performance skool, purplow, rihey, special edition, the union
Saturday, February 21, 2015
@ 3:24 PM
hello.
its been a so long since i last updated and finally i feel like there is sth for me worth taking down or penning my thoughts.
so its been a long time since i got invited to someone's house and especially yesterday minji invited me to go over to her house for seolnal. 설날 also known as cny. so yea i was honestly excited cos ive nv been to ppl's house for such festival and i kinda anticipated for 떡국. and so took an hour subway ride to her house and then finally met up with her at the station.
she led me to her house and it was already kinda different from the seoul which ive been living in. it kinda felt like incheon for some area. anw its along that feeling and i thought minji is living in a apartment which is equivalent to sg's hdb. but now i was wrong. it seemed like a smaller version of what i had imagined. this is what media does to your collective memory.
i felt kinda shameful at my thoughts. mainly because i thought everyone's financial status is equal or much higher than what i have. but no there are a lot people out there who are less capable than me. i feel blessed that i have my parents who are still paying for my living expenses and here i am spending money as if i earned them. ha..
the thing that im really grateful for ppl like minji is that she doesnt judge you. she doesnt care where you came from. racism and discrimination are still happening in the world and its rare to find ppl like her. the touching thing was that she knew that im alone in seoul, alone in the dorm, just using my computer and passing time and so inviting me for seolnal was like really omg. love her.
and when i went to her house i bought like the korean version box of fruit juice and the sg cny snack that i still havent eaten. and dear shes so cute that she likes it so much haha. i mean of course i will love it when people give me sth from their home country and its sth which they treasure so much so im glad that she enjoyed it. haha. theres this verse which says its better to give than take. sth like that. for that time i felt there is so true. hahaha.
yup. just touched to have friends like minji ^^
anw happy chinese new year~! and less than 2 weeks to school reopen~ TTT no.....
Labels: cny, dance, friends, god, kudt, life, love
Monday, January 05, 2015
@ 11:52 PM
since 2006
hello.
so i basically only left with abit more than a day in sg and the feeling comes again. sometimes before u leave a country not just korea or sg but sometimes when u just travel overseas, theres this 'i dont wanna leave this place' feel. yup. and its happening to me right now. back in korea i was like.. i dont wanna leave korea for sg. and now suddenly im like i dont really feel like leaving sg for korea. sighs. but what can i do.. its life. a life which i chose.
thinking about it we have came a long way. since 2006 we were being placed in 1G2 for a reason and then idk for some reason we still kept in contact with each other. im really grateful for this group of friends with awesome personalities. lol. most of them are returning to australia and i will be going back to korea soon. ha~ awesome and truly blessed~ ^^
and plus today when we went back to crescent we happened to bump into one of the teachers whom taught me back in sec 1 and 4. ha now he's the eng hod! lol. thankful for him for pulling my eng grades that time in sec 4. and actually im surprised by how he actually remembered me! haha. but he messed up our names with our faces. haha. XD but its ok because at least he still remembers. lol.
so yea. gonna miss this bunch of awesome frens~ ^^ and thanks to all those who met up with me during this short trip and im just thankful for the events which happened. both good and bad. i kinda feel that for this 2 weeks stay back home i kinda spent more time with ppl. like. first the passport thing was kinda like a blessing in disguise. i want to believe it is. and so it will be. haha. through that i got to spend more times with my dad and mum individually. i feel blessed to be born as their daughter. and blessed to have such awesome parents. i love them~ and then i got to meet up with my crescent friends which i felt its really great because i only thought about it just now. i have known them for 9 years. and for regina this year is going to be the 10th year i have known her. gotta feel blessed to be with her. thank god for all these amazing people~ ^^
and so yea. i guess god just wanted to take a break from my busy life. dancer life back in korea. and now i guess im prepared to go back? XD haha. im not sure. but yea. i will be back. dancing during the holidays and maybe writing a script for a mini movie project for storytellers. yup. awesome~ cant wait. ^^
i know its kinda late but happy 2015~! i believe it will be busy, crazy, working overload year but we will get through it.
Labels: crescent, dance, family, friends, god, kudt, life
Wednesday, December 31, 2014
@ 11:34 PM
just like the seasons
hello.
so in order rush before the last second before 2014 ends, im gonna rush it through. gonna talk about the highlights of 2014 like what most people usually do before the 12am second strike.
well i guess the most eventful things which happened in my 2014 is KOREA UNIVERSITY. lol. just being a student there changed and allowed me to experience a lot of things which i doubt i would be able to do so back home. i mean its not a bad thing but u know, u just learn stuff out of your comfort zone. ha.
getting into ku, trying to adjust to the different learning environment, trying to make korean friends but still wondering why u dont get to know them and then giving up and realise that one shouldnt force it. cos it will just happen naturally as it goes along the way. and then after which its kudt which kinda honestly changed a lot of my uni life as a student. to be more specific, as an international student. and then there is also the storytellers which i treasure them so much.
we've been through so much and we've always work so hard. sometimes i agree with other people saying that international students actually work harder than the other students because of the language barrier. because of the language barrier we tend to even work harder just because we dont want to come to the losing end as compared to the others. we still want to be treated the same. its never easy and im glad i have them. my lovely storytellers <3 div="" nbsp="">
and i have my bunch of kudt dongsaengs. without them i feel like i would not be able to truly experience the life as a korean uni student. sometimes i feel like maybe they think as me like an alien. lol. like someone who is so new to their culture and hence interesting to them. i make silly mistakes which also allowed them to laugh it off and just really immerse with them. a huge bunch of thanks to them who always helped me out. thanks alot. really. love you guys.
and so in about less than 30mins its gonna be 2015. what do i expect? ha. nth much but just a better me. always striving to live my life to the fullest. dance hard. study hard. play hard. love hard. enjoy life. give thanks. and having faith. and pray.
happy 2015 to everyone out there!
새 해 복 많이 받으세요~! ^^
Labels: dance, family, friends, god, korea, ku, kudt, life, storytellers
Wednesday, December 24, 2014
@ 10:31 PM
i will never let it go
hello.
so im back in singapore to settle issues. issues which i dont wish to talk about on my blog which i havent blogged for so long. but anw ever since i came back from korea which was yesterday i had thought a lot about things.
things meaning life. and priorities in life. being the emotional self again. so as u guys know that i actually got lucky and got picked by kim jong kook to film for running man. i thought about my korean name. i feel like making it official. it may sounds crazy but i really do. i feel like for some people, they just create a korean name because they want to make it easier for the koreans to address them easily and for other people some may take it serious about their name. i guess its both for me. and honestly my korean name 진전애 doesnt really make much sense. mainly 진 jin comes from my chinese surname chen and if say it long enough it sounds like zhen which means 'real' in chinese which then translates to 진 jin in korean. so thats why many of the chinese whom i have met in ku they have the surname 진 as well. and as for 전 i still havent decided on what it should be but most like i will go with the meaning of 'entire'. and 애 obviously love. lol. hence 진전애. entirely real love? LOL. wth am i talking about. i have no idea who that came out but likely it was because that time cheryl tried to make a korean name for all of us and hence from then onwards i have been using that korean name.
so my main point is that i wanna make it official. idk how and if it is even possible but i really do want to make my korean name official. i think i have a lot of attachment and feelings towards that name now. haha. i still like my birth name of course. both are special to me.
and through life. there is just no matter how smooth it may looks it will always be tough and challenging. and i really do believe that god made u go through it to learn from sth. asking me to be kind to be people. people whom i do not know. because honestly just by treating people nice and stuff it really makes a lot of difference. people like it when others treat u nice so by applying the same logic we should be nice and kind to people.
i swear today i was so so so so annoyed by the trips to the embassy but until the ica when it was my turn at the counter the lady was so nice. she kinda lifted my spirit up. honestly. thank god for her. she made me believe in service industry again. sounds dramatic. but no it wasnt. it was really tough. and she was nice enough to explain to me about the oath and passport stuff. thank you.
and if u guys ask why i am being so dramatic and sensitive over this issue, its because as u guys know. because of kudt. yes. im not lying. i dont want to lose them. if i lose them i lose 2 of the most precious things in my life. i admit i have someone im interested in dt and i feel like i will lose them. i am scared. still scared. its so scary how love drives one person crazy.
and just now my mum asked me when i will come back longer for holidays next time. when i will stop dancing. for that moment i felt kind of hurt. i mean i obviously do want to stay longer back home with my family but dancing is another thing. im sorry. some may not get me. ha. both are as important to me. i sound crazy. 시발 난 미친년같애. 존나 울고 싶다.
i just prayed that for once things will go in the right way.
have a happy christmas everyone.
Do not let your hearts be troubled.
Trust in God; trust also in me.
John 14:1
Labels: dance, family, friends, god, kudt, life
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
@ 7:59 PM
hello.
so its been so so so so so long since i last blogged. first thing is that my com screwed up and i couldnt get the internet unless i have wifi. so as u guys know the internet i use on my com in the dorm is through lan cable wire. and apparently after my com kinda died, i couldnt do much stuff and i cannot really use my com. so it wasnt a very good thing. to start of im just gonna say that one of the main few events which had happened in the past 2/3 weeks were ku vs yonsei games, goyeon jeon and then my birthday and another good news~ hahahahha.
so as u guys know i have been preparing for dt freshmen dance and finally im so glad that everything turned out so well~ and the good news is that for the first time in history, ku won all 5 games against yonsei. i attended the baseball as well as the basketball match. omg i swear the basketball match was so good. and im glad to say that a fren from dt gave me the basketball ticket. without her ticket i think i will just be so sad. its really awesome. i think the thing so amazing about goyeonjeon is that everyone will jump up from their seat whenever someone scored. and then we will start singing the bam bam bam bam victory song. haha. it was so fun.
and because on the 2nd day of goyeonjeon i couldnt watch either the rugby or soccer match because i had to be in sch by 2pm for the dance battle at night, i was streaming the rugby live and i got so excited watching it back at the dorm. lol. i still remembered the times when i was watching the ac rugby match back then in ac. haha. so much memories. hahahahaha. and i didnt know for rugby u have free kick too. LOL. but anw yea. and then when i was in the student union building, the dt kids were streaming live and then we were like doing the bam bam bam bam victory cheer when the soccer players scored. haha. so fun. and yea. and then we kinda prepared for the dance battle and made our way to infront of macs.
its so cool how like the entire road of anam is blocked and then the good thing is that shops and restaurants will give out free food as its goyeonjeon. this is best thing ive ever known so far in uni. i mean like come on, the entire street giving out free food. hahahaha. and for me i managed to get a free cup of my beloved bubble tea. so im like hur hurhur~
and then finally it is 7pm and the dance battle began~ it began with the yonsei freshman first and then after that it was kudt's turn! haha. i just felt that everything was so bam~! like its been so long since i last performed performed in a sense so it was rather cool and refreshing. and to add on its like the audience and crowd were so close to you. they were screaming and cheering for u until the extent that u cannot really hear the music. haha. type kudtdancers on yt and the videos will come out ^^
after that it was more like a public street performance. theres a lot of ppl watching and i just stayed there and watched the rest of the performances. i gotta say it was a rather awesome experience and i just felt like theres so many good and amazing dancers out there and i got to work harder to improve my skills. haha. i think for the rest of the remaining years in ku i will just focus on studying and dancing. hahahaha.
since my bdae was kinda overlapped with goyeonjeon in a sense, the dt kids celebrated for me when we were eating samgyupsal at the end of the dance battle. at least i gotta say that im lucky and they did not give me weirdly mixed drinks. it was bearable. lol. anw and yea. thanks so much to the storytellers for surprising me suddenly and before the kpop class. haha. thank you!!!
and another thing i wanna talk about is that fact that i received scholarship from ku!!! yay~!!! :D haha. i really didnt thought i will get it because its been like so long the 2nd semester had began and i didnt know that they had problems with screening and everything. im so glad that everything turned out so well. just thank god for everything. but now i just feel so stress that i have to maintain my gpa. sigh... i feel that getting A is so hard.
today was my last day for mid terms and i think i screwed up brain science so badly. and im so scared for my grades now. i think its god slapping me, telling me to wake up and continue to study harder. im gonna continue getting this academic excellence scholarship so gonna work hard!! its never gonna be easy because of kudt and struggling with studies but i think thats what make school life fun. i think ever since crescent i have been through this kind of balance. o level and crescent dance. a level and ac dance. and now ku with kudt. haha. its so interesting. and i really felt like there's this sense of accomplishment whenever i do well in both academic area and in dance. makes me feel like an all-rounder. hahahaha. ok. i will definitely try and work hard and pull up my grades. dam it. i really need to get a gpa of at least 4.0. i can do this!! hwaiting!!!
and i think from tmr onwards or sth i can finally go and dance and choreograph this dance. kyeongho and i had decided to choreograph a dance together and perhaps film it? haha. im not sure stilll whats the final plan but we will definitely release and film it yay~! but no inspiration for moves. haha. hopefully i will come out with steps soon. hehe~ ^^
Labels: all kill, birthday, dance, friends, god, ku, kudt, scholarship, 고연전
Monday, September 08, 2014
@ 10:12 PM
being international in korea
hello.
so today is chuseok and chinese's mid autumn festival. went to the hanriver with the storytellers last night and met some new friends. haha. lol. hot guy alert studying in skku. XD but anw its been so long since i actually had fun by the hanriver even though i passed by it every week when i go to church XD
and since its thanksgiving in korea. i might as well blog about sth that recently made me so heart felt. im pretty sure those not into kpop had heard about the ladies code unfortunate car accident. well for some reason when i saw this news i was really shocked. first idols getting car accidents seemed like a pretty common thing and im not say i dont feel bad or anything but i think that this time round it was really major. ive nv seen ladies code real life before but i really liked their debut song as well as their choreography. they are the girl grp which is going to come out strong. i feel so sad for them.
adding on i read about ladies code and sadly eunbi who had passed away had been training for 7 years before they debuted last year. and she could only enjoy that short amount of glamour on stage. its so sad. and the news came yesterday that sadly rise had passed away because her body could not take it anymore. TT i saw the news just directly after church service ended yesterday. so much feels. too young. all of them. too young. will definitely pray for them. and will definitely remember them. s
idk why but this accident just affected me alot. its like idk why. maybe cos eunbi and rise are just 1 and 2 years older than me and i felt like i have so much i have not accomplished. leaving this world is just not the right time yet. i wanna accomplish the mission i have. so im gonna make a tribute for them. hopefully i will do it asap. gonna learn bad girl's choreography and make a cover. just a short one. hopefully it will turn out fine.
yup. so ok. going on a bit of the brighter side. sch has started and so far its been alright? i guess. ha. except for the korean classes. lol. being so stressed over them again. and i got kicked out for one of my media classes because the prof said its not suited for year 1 student. wth??? why didnt u put or mention it in the syllabus first. zzz and now i have to find another class to replace that 3 credit class. cries. so stressful. cos the next time to register for class is on thurs. and thurs i have kudt. omg.
and talking abt kudt. sigh. hiphop's choreography kinda disappeared and now it appeared. first rehearsal on 25th and idk whats gonna happen to us. hiphoppers gonna bring it out right? hwaiting! we can do this. and i feel like i gotten so much closer to the kudt kids and for week 1 of sch i just head over to the 3/6th floor every time class ended for me. lol. im a dt freak. but i gotta admit i like it. lol.
should start doing my supposed hw before school starts again~ haha. and read the book i borrowed. hehe. nice~ happy chuseok everyone~ spread the love~
Labels: chuseok, dance, friends, god, korea, ku, kudt, life, mooncake festival, school
Saturday, August 02, 2014
@ 12:22 AM
aint nobody but you
hello.
so its been quite awhile since i last blogged and yes these days im just spending my time dancing. nothing that i regret seriously. i feel that i have grew so much closer with my dt mates ever since i went for the summer mt with them. i just feel so blessed and everything. its like how should i phrase it. erm. because of the language barrier sometimes i still dont really understand what they are talking about and i dont wanna be like a so called burden on them because they have to like stop or pause or joke because it will be like spoiling the fun because u have to stop and explain it to me.
but then again i still feel more or less accepted by them. its so strange because i nv knew i could mix well with koreans. lol. maybe doing the same thing you like or dancing really makes a difference? haha. because u just communicate through your moves and there isnt much specific terms for it? XD im not sure. but i just feel so much closer to them now. most of them calling me unnie and noona and it just makes u feel like there is this responsibility that u got to take care of them. haha. XD im getting use to the term unnie and noona. and slowly liking it.
but people are leaving dt. makes me feel very blessed to get to stay there. it may not be the best dance team i have been in but the people there make me feel something else. theres this bond. its hard to break away. and being a foreigner there just makes u feel even more like staying there to prove that we can do it as well. u know. ha. idk. just thank god everything.
and yenny's new song. aint nobody. the moment i saw the mv being released i fell in love with it. not just the song but i think basically because of the dance? XD haha. its contempt. and i like contemp. i miss doing zaki style. its hard but its really beautiful. i really admire those who can do contempt, lyrical and modern. its amazing how those lines work and everything. anw thats not the main point.
its the lyrics. luckily this time round the lyrics are rather simple and i could understand without looking at the lyrics. yay to korean skills! talking about the person telling the lover no one else could love you as much as the person did. its sad. like how would u know if the person will love you like no else can? its hard and an unpredictable question. my very best friend. its experiencing sth like this right now. im sorry to all the guys out there but all the situations and stuff which i have experienced and all. i just feel like its so hard to trust guys. sorry i just offended people. sure guys can be an awesome best friend too. but beyond that line. its so hard. or is it just me with guys issues. idk. but i tell myself that guys shouldnt be easily trusted. thats my logic now. if u dont wanna get hurt anymore.
i feel so freaking emo right now. arghhhhh.. roomie is not sleeping at dorm today. emo ttm. just pray that tmr will be better day.
누구도 나처럼 널 사랑하지 못해
Labels: ain't nobody, dance, friends, god, kpop, ku, kudt, life, love, wg, wonder girls, ye eun, yenny
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
@ 3:47 PM
디티~
hello.
so i have just came back from a 3 days 2 night mt with kudt and for the first time round i had so much fun in a mt. haha. i think it was because we kinda already knew each other back then and now its just getting closer to each other. haha.
anw we gathered and left for naksan around 12pm and by the time we reached there it was around 330pm and my grp was grp 5 and there was donggeun sunbae, hyerin sunbae, aya, jiyoon, nuri, bomi, hyerin and eunseok who only came in day 2. before we headed off to eat bbq outside of the chalet like place, we were started discussing what our grp is going to do for the special talent stage performance thing. hyerin sunbae was saying that last time other groups mainly dance but then its more of like not super interesting because we were already dancing so yea. we were trying to think of sth else to be out of the box. haha. and then jiyoon came up with this gta skit. its like one of the section from snl korea and it just so happened i watched that part before. its seriously retarded but super funny.
so my role was to intimate this 16th hip hop senior of ours and its like because every time when he dances, he will have his signature movement of his and then i followed him and lol. the most joke thing was because everyone knows that movement its super funny. ok. i know im the only one knowing whats going on but IT WAS SUPER FUNNY. also cos he was rather tanned they made me wore a black plastic bag. nth got to do with racism but it was for better depiction. and the funny part was he threw a pillow at me to stop LOL. but then again we thought we could have gotten the first place or sth but in the end we were actually tied between 2nd and 3rd but we lost in a freestyle battle so ended up with the 3rd place. but come on! we were against donggyu, lol i swear he can freestyle so well. WHAT IS HE MADE UP OF??
anw~ it was really fun and then we went back to our room and donggeun sunbae made this very nice fried rice for us. lol. and we played drinking games. i think every time i drink with koreans i will learn new games. i think this game that i learnt its called 'assa~~! neo neo!' i think i like to play this kind of game. its like 'bunny bunny' but more confusing cos it involves more than 1 person. OK. FRENS I NEED TO TEACH U HOW TO PLAY. we can drink sprite and play lol. and then after that ppl keep losing and their faces got kinda red we decided to rest and continue eating. lol. we ate so much. 2 days time i ate so much meat i wanna die.
and then i cant remember what happened but oh yea! we went to the beach at night and i was like omg yay!!!! BEACH~!!! SEA~!! i just have this thing for beaches~ ^^ so cooling and nice. and the sand was really sandy and hyerin sunbae treated us to icecream hehe. after that we also saw other ppl playing those fireworkds kind of thing. those kdrama always show the koreans playing with the fireworks. haha. yup. wished i played with it too XD
after that we went back and actually the other ppl were doing cypher and we didnt want to do the jam with them so we went back and suddenly decided to dance amongst ourselves. lol. jiyoon tried to make me do the front part of something by girls' day and it was so funny. and then for some reason we did good night kiss also and then jiyoon was like so amazed that i can do so many kpop dance and she was like keep telling the ppl who came into our room that i can do good night kiss and i think i danced like 5 times because of her TT and then ever since that there was like a 10th hip hop senior who now just recognised me as 'good night kiss' lol. yup. i cant really remember what happened but i got tired and tried to sleep. didnt work out very well. lol.
the next day after all of us woke up from our not very successful sleep last night, we went to the beach. haha. it was so sunny and hot but the sea breeze made that up. it was really windy and then jiyoon and i actually didnt want to go into the sea yet but after chilling on the beach for about an hour later we went inside. lol. as soon as i went into the sea ppl noticed that i was dry they came and attacked me and dunked me. LOL. dam shit. namjoo sunbae was like good night kiss! and threw me inside. and then another time daehwan sunbae dunked me for like 3 times straight LOL. omg. dam shit. and then swallowed quite a lot of sea water. haha. but it was so nice to swim around and splash water at people. lol. after that we went back to chalet to wash up. haha.
after that we all gathered and there were told that we were supposed to have a cooking competition with the other groups and the most delicious one will be picked by the 3 seniors. we ended up cooking japanese maggie mee and german hot dogs with doritos and pistachios LOL
we didnt win sadly but other groups came and tried ours. haha. its like voted informally as the best thanks to the maggie mee which aya brought from japan ^^ hehe. and then after that i katalked yuna to bring over some when she comes to korea in august yay! after that started playing drinking game again but i was like bleh. lol. i still dont like to drink but i played awhile and the game was getting so violent but funny. lol. another new game learnt. so i left and went to the other grp and checked out what they were doing. they were making yoghurt soju lol. i gotta admit yoghurt soju and lemonade soju are my favourite. and they mixed the proportion really well. hahaha. yoghurt soju~ lalalla.
after that they made us do cypher and jiyoon told the senior to play good night kiss just for me LOL WTH i taught eunseok and jiyoon how to dance after we came back from the beach and then i pulled eunseok to come and dance with me. LOL. so funny cos eunseok is just so cute. lol. this guy. 1996 TT and then was like yea. the seniors started dancing to their old songs and after awhile some of us just escaped back to our room. lol. man... idk how to improve on my freestyling and tmr we going to have this thing call ggumsaessak. its like a impromptu dance u have to choreograph. omg.
went back to the room and spotted nuri who escaped long ago. LOL. and then after awhile jiyoon and saeyeong came into the room and we ended up doing kpop dance again. LOL. after that 2 of them wanted to go and join the rest in playing drinking games so it ended up with just me and nuri left. we decided to just share and cook a packet of ramen and dumpling. and then while we just talking and waiting for the water to boil suddenly sungah sunbaenim came into the room and she was like 아둘이연애중이야? 미안해! and left. lol i swear she can just be so funny sometimes. and then after that jiyoon came back and ate with us.
i actually slept more than the first day as ppl were more playing in the big room as compared to the smaller rooms and then yea. woke up the next morning with very little sleep but got to pack and tidy and clean the room. and then after washing up i suddenly heard this zehhhhhhh sound. then i was like what is that sound. but i was still in the very groggy state and then i turned around and saw nuri using the electronic shaver. LOL. for the first time after dk how long i heard that sound and i was looking at nuri. and nuri also had that groggy state looking at me and i almost burst out laughing. ok that was hard to explain but it was just a funny sight.
reached back ku about 3pm and had a late lunch with jiyoon and saeyeong before heading back to the dorm. woa. finally felt like i had a proper meal after 2 days. hahahaha. after all it was a really enjoyable experience and yup! time to rest! hehehe.~ tmr ggumsaessak hwaiting! ^^
Labels: beach, dance, friends, god, ku, kudt, mt, summer mt
Wednesday, July 02, 2014
@ 11:52 PM
4.09 계속 열심히 공부하자~
hello
well today was a rather surprising day for me because i woke up forgetting the fact that its result day and i only realised it when i saw the 300+ messages in the media katalk room. and i was like oh yea and so i checked it and babam~! lol. im really really surprised for my intro to media. i got an A+ like wth??? im pretty sure i didnt put in that much effort but oh yea... i think its just a sign for me to study harder for my next media compulsory module. hehe wow. im really happy for my results. esp for my sapyo class. i got a B+ can u believe it? ^^ my korean essay class~ yay! and i have been complaining and worrying for my entire sem on that module. guess its better than what i expected. truly thank god for that. ^^
and today i learnt that actually there are really many ppl out there struggling to live their own life. we are just young ppl turning into adults and most of us are still blessed to be funded by our parents and some already trying to rely on themselves. its nv easy and i just pray for those out there. sometimes we just have to comply to some ppl because we need their financial support. sometimes we just have to break this relationship with the ppl u loved just so that u can do what u want. i mean i wouldnt say i mature early or anything but i truly believe that we should study and do what u want to pursue coming from my own experience. its nv easy and u are not always given the opportunity and im the lucky fews who get to do that. i mean. try. fight for it. if it doesnt work out. make it work out.
and dont judge.
Labels: friends, god, korea, ku, life
Saturday, June 07, 2014
@ 12:26 AM
KUDT~!
hello.
so today i participated in my very first dance battle with kyunghee's balgwang and kookmin's busta~! lol. it was like shit for me cos i totally screwed it up XD
it was like when u reached the studio the other 2 schools were already there and they were like practising their steps. its so freaking intimidating. seriously. like omg. there freshmen are so good~! lalala. it just got to show that i have practice more. freestyle is so HARD. argh. and today i finally saw krump for the first time in my life. it really looks like an angry dance but its really cool when u do it well. the guy from kookmin if im not wrong did it really well. and its like woa~ applause.
last kudt dance prac before holiday pracs yesterday TT but im still going for jazz funk hard training tmr. hwaiting~! hopefully everything well be fine. have been dancing for 3 days straight and i have to film my aca eng movie tmr also. and i will meet up with royce tmr. lol. its so strange cos i feel like i meet more ppl when im in seoul rather than when im in sg. it shows ppl actually know im in korea? haha. i mean like those ppl who i have nv contact them for a really time. XD
anw so freaking tired. hwaiting~!
Labels: dance, friends, gta, ku, kudt, school
Thursday, June 05, 2014
@ 12:05 AM
hello.
16 days to singapore.
춤을 잘하고 싶다 난 할 수 있겠지? 계속 선배님께서 잘한다는 칭찬을 많이 받았는데 난 진짜 잘하는건가? 뭔가. 실감이 안 와. 게다가 난 힙합에 대해 실력이 진짜 모자라 ㅠㅠ 화이팅 해야징~ 다들 화이팅 합시당~!
if i had a choice i wish i have enrolled in an arts high school. i wish singapore was as supportive as korea in terms of their arts. its so common for ppl to attend an arts high school or an arts uni. just sense of admiration. the fun they have and everything.
the 1999 girl whom i met in def chatted with me recently again and she told me shes preparing for her entrance admission to hanlim arts high. its really famous so i hope she can get in. not sure what is the main point of this post but i feel like my thoughts havent been very collected these days. busy with school work and kudt and team project.
yesterday kudt ended 15mins earlier and there wasnt hard training so i decided to finish learning the good night kiss choreography. went down to the 3rd floor studio myself. its like for some reason because theres 2 mirrors and i was alone it felt nice. lol. like. my home needs to have a wall of mirror next time.XD
kk jumping to another part of my post. recently the thing that had been getting on my nerves is the other 2 foreigners in my media project. i admit i was wrong for not going to one of the grp meetings because i was lazy but i dont understand why they are so shameless (?) in not doing anything for the grp project. its like wow.. and today one of my dept mates brought up a really point on fb. its like do those ppl who dont do team project not do their work also or do they do only their work? i would say both. there are 2 kinds of ppl. but then again its like they read the messages in the katalk room and they dont reply. i mean at least i read and understand whats going on and reply when they asked us for help and u dont its like so wtf. argh. its like i wanna strangle u. thats why some koreans dont like foreigners.
we are already in a disadvantage and furthermore giving ppl trouble by not helping much already and u still dont try yr best??? why? thats why ppl have bad impression and ppl dont like to work with us. they think we are slackers.... no. not true. not all are. sigh... but then again its true that foreigners in korea still have this gap. some of them bridge it really well but those ppl are RARE. i admit im not one of them. i have korean frens but we are not close. its like. its really hard.. more like i feel like if im better in korean and im more open and taking initiatives i would have more korean frens. but whatever. im fine with the storytellers. ^^
yup. and finals are coming so soon. i feel like getting a 3.8 gpa is so hard suddenly. im pretty sure im getting a B/C for my sapyo TTT so sad. but i admit the koreans there are really strong. and A/B for eng ling. im pretty sure i can get an A for my eng gram class. and im not sure for my academic eng. hopefully i can get an A too. and my screen chinese... im gonna work hard and remember all those words. hopefully a A/B CRIES. SO HARD. /rolls. gpa. sian.
and the last part of good night kiss is so fast TT haha. last kudt session tmr before stopping a week for finals TT GGS~!
V=RD
Labels: dance, exams, family, friends, ku, kudt, school, singapore
